Tuesday, January 25, 2011

and a good day to you...

Do you have any idea how hard it is to sell a kidney around here?

I am trying to find legal ways to make money, and aside from selling a kidney, or maybe renting my uterus..I'm having a hard time coming up with ideas. My wife, because she is awesome is having a bake sale/fundraiser through her economics class to help me raise some money, and I am working 4 or 5 days a week...but damn this is hard!

And prostitution is out, I don't really want to have sex with strangers. So is any kind of illegal activity because
a) I'm not a devious or evil person and crime isn't really my style and
b)  My lawyer probably wouldn't appreciate dirty money. He's not P. Diddy. (That would be kind of cool though)

So I sit, and I think, and I work at night making my customers laugh, and serving the best pizza and steak in town. Collecting tips, hoping to win the lottery, and thinking about a career in Stand Up Comedy...and what it would feel like to wake up in a bathtub full of ice.



Monday, January 3, 2011

An Epic Wave of Frustration

So..I haven't posted in forever because I am
a.) Busy
b.) Lazy
c.) Moderately Forgetful
d.) A complete scatterbrain

I am currently on break from my classes at school, which is good, because I have a shitload of homework to do, but also, because I am stressing about a million different things right now, and it's hard to make my brain focus on Real Estate projects when I owe out thousands and thousands of dollars that I don't have to roughly one million people. I will probably never own my own home (unless I marry rich) so fuck all these fake bastards that have 2 or 3.

My other major issue is court. I'm in a stupid battle for something I already have, that no one should be able to take away from me in the first place. But..I won't go into details..this isn't WikiLeaks.

I am working part time, I am going to school, I have a child, and among other things...I am being pulled in what feels like a million directions, with little thoughts bubbles surrounding me, and everyone in the yelling. Grades up, attendance up, tuition paid, go to work, raise your son, keep your home life happy, be faithful, be honest, be true,be all you can be. FUCK THAT. How do people manage to keep themselves going and not burn out from all that life throws at you??

I have been through worse. I beat a crippling addiction, and a life on the streets. I have a beautiful, healthy, happy child, and a nice home. I work hard, I try to be decent. I know that I'm moody, and sometimes I'm hard to live with..but who wouldn't be? I dare someone to walk in my shoes, and tell me that you can do a better job, after the life that I led, and the way I abused the world around me, and grow to be a strong and independant healthy adult.

I know that things are going to work out, but the stress of money is almost overwhelming. I can make it. I am determined. My child deserves everything life can offer, and I will be the one to provide it to him.

I'm not sure where this all came from, but I'm tired, and I need to go to bed.

Happy New Year. 2011 better watch it. I'm going to kick this years ASS.